I read something today that made me peek through my fingers.
You see, I have shut my eyes. They have been shut for approx. 2 months now.
Squeezed so tightly to ignore the world and it’s comings & goings.
I can not see the full extent of the wounds.
I know that they are there. My hands are pressing down on them trying to apply enough pressure so that they won’t bleed as much.
So I can keep on breathing.
But I refuse to look.
I do not want to see.
All of the differences and similarities, I am ignoring them.
It’s selfish, yes I know it is.
I promised The People of My Heart that I would keep on breathing.
This is me doing what I have to do.
“I changed when you came into my life. Time and experience had left me rough around the edges. I learned to get on, without needing anything or anyone else. I never wanted to be different or try and be better for any other person. But then you happened. You showed me what it was to love. How beautiful it could be to share something like that with another person. And then I wanted to be better for you all of the time. For some reason, I was never able to do it.”
This is just a small section from the thing that I read today.
The full story is here.
It’s from a site called LeLove.
LeLove is a website that is made up of reader submissions about stories of love. The good, the bad and the ugly. It’s not all cotton candy romance. I like that.
One day, sometime soon maybe, I’ll open my eyes again.
I’ll give up the ghost of you and move on.
French Chocolate cupcakes with White chocolate Ganache.
I really really adore French Chocolate cupcakes. Know why? These cupcakes actually use chocolate rather than cocoa.
Plus they are French. Yum. <3 Speak to me in a French accent and it’s guaranteed that I’ll swoon.
I am swooning already in anticipation.
(PS- The original recipe is here.)
For the Cupcakes –
180g Chocolate. (We used dark.)
2 Tablespoons Baking Powder.
1 cup Milk.
Oven = 180° C or 350° F.
-Melt the chocolate in a double boiler. (Cheap double boiler! – Place the chocolate in a bowl and put the bowl into a pot of boiling water.)
-Keep on stirring until chocolate is smooth and then take off heat.
-Beat eggs with a whisk in another bowl.
-Cream butter and sugar until pale.
-Add the whisked eggs to the butter-sugar mixture.
-Add chocolate to the butter-sugar-egg mixture.
-Shift the flour and baking powder into another bowl.
-Add the flour-baking powder alternatively with milk to the butter-sugar-egg mixture.
-Pour the batter into liners 3/4 full and put them in the oven for 20mins.
White chocolate Ganache.
200g White Chocolate.
200g Icing sugar.
150g Soft butter.
-Melt white chocolate in double boiler or the same method as above.
-Cream butter and icing sugar until light and pale.
-Add chocolate, mix and refrigerate until it is firm enough without running.
I actually made these with Syill on one of our baking days. We also made Sausage buns.
I love sausage buns.
Mmmmm yum. <3
You know what people of the internet?
I’m going to make more.
Just because I can.