An ode to a Cat.

Oh I wish, I wish I was a cat.
Sleep all day, play at night.
To be waited on paw and paw.
Jump on the table, steal their food.
Oh pitiful humans, just for me?
No more labs, no more assignments, no more of this thing called ‘learning’.
Soak up the sun and get ever so warm.
A belly rub? Yes please.
A bowl of milk? Please, you flatter me.
If you please me enough, which you very well might do, I might awake from my Sun drenched stupor and exert some energy into catching a present for you.
Here is my thanks, my eternal gratitude!
I wish all of my human servants were as lovely as you.
You do not like?
You do not cherish it?
You throw it away? Like garbage?
I am astounded, flabbergasted and hurt.
All of that time I invested into that gift.
For that I will lift my tail as high as it may go and venture into your bedroom.
From there I will quite happily sleep on your pillow and molt.
You see? All throughout the night you will have my fur of disappointment plaguing you.
Let this be a lesson Human.
Oh I wish, I wish I was a cat.
Sun drenched, disgusted and all.

——————
Plus! I learnt in my Philo class that it is possible to assign Happiness and Unhappiness a numerical value. There is a system. It’s Hedonic Utilitarianism.
So today I am currently 1064 dolors and 72 hedons.
Mostly because I like the number 72.
Above all it tickles me fluro that someone can actually go around calculating how happy they are.

xo Mel.

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About kamaness

Hi! I'm Mel. I run Kamaness with my two siblings Karl and Ness. Not that they post. It's pretty much just me talking about myself to myself.
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