Drowning in air.

Sometimes my reading between the lines is correct.
I’m right even when I don’t want to be.
Everyone has those moments.

I was right.
I am right.

Boyfriend broke up with me.
He’s no longer in love with me.

I’m left with pieces on the floor.
I’m exhausted.
I don’t want to pick them up again.
They have been picked up so many times. Some were lost, some were created.
On the floor.

I thought I was finished.
I honestly thought I was finished.
He thought so too.
Until he realised that he just didn’t care if he talked to me or not. He didn’t want to touch me.
Until he realised he didn’t love me.

He walked away.

Everyone tells you how to get over the bad guy but how do you get over the nice guy that fall out of love?
How do you get over the sweet caring guy that you love?

How do you get over the good guy?

I’m drowning in tears, literally drowning in tears. I haven’t stopped crying since more than five hours ago.
I want to shout at the world “That’s enough! No more! Please! No more! I can’t take any more!”
I don’t care about how this is going to make me a better person.
At this moment I don’t care.
All I can focus on is the feeling of drowning without water.
Sinking to the bottom.
In limbo. Not dead but not quite alive either.

I miss him.
I miss him already.

xo Mel.


About kamaness

Hi! I'm Mel. I run Kamaness with my two siblings Karl and Ness. Not that they post. It's pretty much just me talking about myself to myself.
This entry was posted in Pondering thoughts. and tagged , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Drowning in air.

  1. Cas says:

    I love you.
    Rain or drought, sun or clouds.
    I’m here and I’m not leaving. No matter what. Ever.
    I love you. You’re going to get through it. I’m right beside you.
    No drowning. I’ll swim with you. The ocean’s the limit.

  2. kamaness says:

    I love you.
    It’s more like a storm on open water but longer.
    Thank you. /Thank you/
    At the moment I am unsure, the grief is so stretched so far ahead.
    I can’t see the end.
    Thank you.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s